Making life work?

I have been scouring the web for some inspiration on writing topics outside of product reviews. I stumbled upon some self-reflective suggestions (some very hippy dippy), one word prompts where you write about whatever comes to mind based on the word of the day/week/whatever, and then bam! I saw something encouraging you to write about how you make life work. I got so fucking exciting I started brainstorming how I could really write a relatable piece. I got excited that I’m a 30-something year old that works, balances family and friends, and tries to grow and thrive. Then BAM! That excitement quickly dissipated as I started discounting various aspects of my life and how I am actually not making life work, I am just surviving. I am no great inspiration. I have no grandiose adventure to tell readers about. I sure as hell don’t have profound wisdom or knowledge to pass along. At first a tiny part of me began trying to argue those dismissals… but I am alive right? I must have something of value to add. Then I sat and stared.

There are a lot of us out there that don’t know what the hell we are doing. There are lots of people riddled with anxiety and depression that let those same dismissals prevent them from thriving and making life work. I slowly and bashfully raise my hand as someone who lets excuses and my own self-deprecating thoughts sabotage elements in my life. So what can we all do to pick ourselves up off the floor or roll out of the bed, and start making life work better?

  • Set a simple goal and do it!

This was a nugget of knowledge passed on to me when I was in high school. I’ve come a long way from the teenager crying in her bedroom that needed some encouragement but I still go back to this piece of advice. Whether it be walking around the block every day or attending a new book club once a month. Do it! After a while this is either going to energize you and have you wanting to do it more or it’s going to suck the life right out of you.

  • Give up energy suckers.

Whether its people in your life or that goal you set above sometimes we need to give things up. And that’s okay. It is also easier said than done. Stop going to the book club, stop walking around the bloody block…but replace it with something rather than going back to doing nothing. As a people pleaser the guilt is awful so I struggle to cut people out and I feel bad not showing up to do that thing I hate but I need to remind myself it is okay.

  • Talk to yourself the way you would talk to others.

You would never tell your girlfriends that they look fat so why is it okay to say it to yourself? Your boss wouldn’t tell you that you are a useless piece of shit …so again why is it okay to say to yourself? Like # 2 above this is much easier said than done. Practice it. Stop yourself if you catch yourself being nasty and reframe what you are saying.

  • Take a deep fucking breath!

Why is this so simple and helpful in all areas of life yet we tend to forget to do it? Work is hectic…take a few deep breaths and continuing is easier. Your partner has pissed you off…take a few deep breaths and maybe count to 5 then you can better deal with the issue.

  • Keep on trying.

This is the most important one. You are going to trip and fall. You are going to call yourself an asshole and not reframe it. You’re going to continue those energy sucking hobbies. And that’s OKAY! Try again next time.

So many people fall into a negative cyclical way of living that involves strides in the right direction and then one tiny slip that spins them right back to the bottom. It shouldn’t be that way! It would also help if we could be more kind to each other, stop keeping up with the Jones’, and learn to actually like ourselves. But hey, one step at a time.

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